JAYNE WELCOMES CHRISTINA DODD
Jayne, here, to welcome Christina Dodd, whose fabulous new paranormal, SCENT OF DARKNESS has just arrived in stores. (By the way, you're going to love this one! Starts off with a heroine who has decided to seduce her boss only to discover to her horror that he is not quite what she expected, if you get my drift).
Anyhow, Christina has promised to blog on a philosophical topic today. We here at RWQ are very excited because we're all about sophisticated, high brow stuff like philosophy. I will admit it never occurred to us that a former squawker might know much about that kind of thing, but what the hey... Go for it, Christina!
CHRISTINA DODD ASKS: WHAT IS HELL?
No, no, I’m not making comparisons between the Running With Quills authors and Hell. At least, none of them except for … well, never mind.
I’m really here to talk about my new paranormal series, Darkness Chosen, is a big, dramatic chain of stories linked by a family who signed an ancient pact with the devil, and the one branch chosen to break the pact. The consequences of failure are dire — when their beloved father dies, he’ll be condemned to hell. In this story, hell is a very traditional place of fire and eternal torment.
But my college-age daughter said no, that’s not hell. She claims her chem professor is obviously the devil, and he showed her a hell made up of simpler things. She said we all get a taste of hell every day.
Sometimes, I think she’s right.
For instance, in my work hell:
— I’ll work in retail at Christmastime where they play the same carols over and over and over and over …
— I’ll get yelled at for everyone else’s mistakes
— All my pencils will have the erasers worn down
— No one I work with will have the ability to fill up the paper tray/change the toilet paper/make the coffee/clean up after themselves
— In the next check stand, there’ll be that guy who talks loudly because he wants to entertain everyone — and he’s boring.
In my hell bathroom
— The toilet paper’s not attached well and when I pull, it comes off and rolls on the disgusting wet floor.
— I’ll always follow that person who doesn’t wash her hands, then touches everything on the way out, especially the door handle.
In my hell restaurant:
— My water will never get refilled.
— And they’ll give me all the free hot salsa and chips I can eat.
— At the next table, there’ll be that guy who talks loudly because he wants to entertain everyone — and he’s boring.
In my vacation hell:
— They’ll serve Pepsi.
— The beach will be filled with thin, toned people, especially That Girl in a string bikini.
— There’ll be a fabulous Olympic-sized lap swimming pool, and as I swim through the warm blue waters … I’ll swim through a warm spot.
When I fly:
— I’ll follow that jerk onto the plane who brings on the largest carry-on bag and blocks the aisle while he pounds it in the overhead.
— He’ll be the same guy who thinks he doesn’t have to turn off his cell phone when he’s instructed to
— Every bag of peanuts they give me will be impossible to open, and finally I’ll rip it and peanuts will fly all over.
— I’ll be seated between the lady with too much perfume and the businessman who’s been wearing the same suit for three days.
— In the seat directly behind me, the guy with the big carry-on and the cell phone will talk loudly because he wants to entertain everyone — and he’s boring.
In my everyday hell life:
— At my gym, all the women will put on makeup and jewelry to exercise. Except me.
— I’ll stand behind that guy in the 9-item express lane with 12 items, and he won’t pull out his check book until his order is rung up and bagged.
— Someone will always flush while I’m in the shower.
— That guy who talks loudly because he wants to entertain everyone — and he’s boring — will follow me everywhere.
So what about your hell? Is your hell going to be full of people who automatically deduct 10 points from your IQ when you speak with a Southern accent? Teachers who think everyone should belong to the same political party as them? Bad losers? Will there be elevator music everywhere? In hell, do all the bridesmaids’ dresses have a gigantic bow on the butt? Tell us all.
While you’re planning your perfect day in hell, don’t forget to enjoy SCENT OF DARKNESS, the first book in the Darkness Chosen series. TOUCH OF DARKNESS follows in August.
Oh! And really, ignore the rumor about the Quills authors. They are all really good people. Good. Kind. Generous. Angelic.
Really.
I’m really here to talk about my new paranormal series, Darkness Chosen, is a big, dramatic chain of stories linked by a family who signed an ancient pact with the devil, and the one branch chosen to break the pact. The consequences of failure are dire — when their beloved father dies, he’ll be condemned to hell. In this story, hell is a very traditional place of fire and eternal torment.
But my college-age daughter said no, that’s not hell. She claims her chem professor is obviously the devil, and he showed her a hell made up of simpler things. She said we all get a taste of hell every day.
Sometimes, I think she’s right.
For instance, in my work hell:
— I’ll work in retail at Christmastime where they play the same carols over and over and over and over …
— I’ll get yelled at for everyone else’s mistakes
— All my pencils will have the erasers worn down
— No one I work with will have the ability to fill up the paper tray/change the toilet paper/make the coffee/clean up after themselves
— In the next check stand, there’ll be that guy who talks loudly because he wants to entertain everyone — and he’s boring.
In my hell bathroom
— The toilet paper’s not attached well and when I pull, it comes off and rolls on the disgusting wet floor.
— I’ll always follow that person who doesn’t wash her hands, then touches everything on the way out, especially the door handle.
In my hell restaurant:
— My water will never get refilled.
— And they’ll give me all the free hot salsa and chips I can eat.
— At the next table, there’ll be that guy who talks loudly because he wants to entertain everyone — and he’s boring.
In my vacation hell:
— They’ll serve Pepsi.
— The beach will be filled with thin, toned people, especially That Girl in a string bikini.
— There’ll be a fabulous Olympic-sized lap swimming pool, and as I swim through the warm blue waters … I’ll swim through a warm spot.
When I fly:
— I’ll follow that jerk onto the plane who brings on the largest carry-on bag and blocks the aisle while he pounds it in the overhead.
— He’ll be the same guy who thinks he doesn’t have to turn off his cell phone when he’s instructed to
— Every bag of peanuts they give me will be impossible to open, and finally I’ll rip it and peanuts will fly all over.
— I’ll be seated between the lady with too much perfume and the businessman who’s been wearing the same suit for three days.
— In the seat directly behind me, the guy with the big carry-on and the cell phone will talk loudly because he wants to entertain everyone — and he’s boring.
In my everyday hell life:
— At my gym, all the women will put on makeup and jewelry to exercise. Except me.
— I’ll stand behind that guy in the 9-item express lane with 12 items, and he won’t pull out his check book until his order is rung up and bagged.
— Someone will always flush while I’m in the shower.
— That guy who talks loudly because he wants to entertain everyone — and he’s boring — will follow me everywhere.
So what about your hell? Is your hell going to be full of people who automatically deduct 10 points from your IQ when you speak with a Southern accent? Teachers who think everyone should belong to the same political party as them? Bad losers? Will there be elevator music everywhere? In hell, do all the bridesmaids’ dresses have a gigantic bow on the butt? Tell us all.
While you’re planning your perfect day in hell, don’t forget to enjoy SCENT OF DARKNESS, the first book in the Darkness Chosen series. TOUCH OF DARKNESS follows in August.
Oh! And really, ignore the rumor about the Quills authors. They are all really good people. Good. Kind. Generous. Angelic.
Really.
Christina Dodd
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posted at 2:06 PM
